followed by...

... the next day @ 1pm we'll be going to see "Year of the Yao" in the city (11.50 for concession, 15 full price) - let me know ASAP if you want to come to this!!

For either event, just comment the proper post if you will be attending (i.e. comment on either the 'saturday' for poker or 'sunday' for yao)

this weekend!!

OK!! Stay tuned to this post, as I will update as details change:

this saturday night:

POKER @ NATE's - starts @ 9!! After dinner!

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1. Probably be a small entry fee (say $3 for each complete round, start to finish), to help keep the game serious and avoid rabid "all-in"'ers, as well as a small incentive to actually win :P

2. There WILL be small quantities of alcohol present (i.e. beer) - BYO for the most though, I'll grab chippies and crap, but please use common sense.

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Notes:

- For those who live quite a distance away (i.e. des and dre), you're more than welcome to stay the night

- We have 5 couches downstairs (1 more upstairs), and a complete extra bathroom/shower downstairs, so there's plenty of room to be comfy

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Map to our house, as it's NOT in the Melways (click for larger view):

Maybe...

... life IS pain, and we just get used to it.

I'm tired and I feel so unlovable...

pain?

It's amazing how God can use something that you've already digested, combine it with someone with a different perspective, and have it just bring such new and timely growth into life :o

Thought I'd chuck on some Phil Baker whilst I coded geekily away (funny, funny guy he is, Pastor of Riverside Church in Perth), and got to a small side point he makes, about making the deliberate decision to go through the pain experience that you are in, learning as much as you go, and determined to make this a stepping stone to reaching the next level:

"...or you could say, I'm at the fork in the road, I'm going to have a lot of pain here, but I'm going to learn lessons from this.

I'm going to come out of it and it's going to be, in retrospect, one of the defining moments of my life."
- Phil Baker

I've heard this particular message many times before, but given recent feelings, insight from Korea, through which already had me on the same page, and my heart position too, the correlation and harmony of it all is hitting home, over and over again...

Simply amazing.

wow - congratulations!!

Shawn (I have no idea which way it's spelt) and Susan have just announced their engagement (source: Jo) - congratulations... another wedding to look forward too!

Still you know me... I'm over the moon for them, but at the same time, it's things like that that further contrast how far I am from having that...

eep, it's already thursday

Had a pretty productive day @ work, left to go to the city where Hanger's organised for use to eat the "Darkside of 604" - a restaurant where you eat in complete darkness. No, I'm not exaggerating, it's not just dim light, it's complete darkness (you cannot see any part of yourself, it's that dark).

Was interesting enough (I'll post the URL soon so you can check it out yourself) - food wasn't fantastic, but it wasn't bad either and cooked well enough. You can either order ala carte before you head in (cuz there's no light, you can't look @ a menu in there) or do what I did (cuz I'm stoopid/adventurous (you decide :P)): order the 'mystery meal', whereby your waiters choose for you, so you have absolutely no idea what you're eating...

My waiters must have been nice, as the food I got wasn't too bad... wasn't a bad experience all in all :) Definitely something different... still haven't had time to expand my w/end thoughts :(

Oh heck...

I KNOW... it was idiotic to do, but I did it... I just completely digested an entire packet of Starburst Joosters and a can of Red Bull in 20mins :( Not deliberately, it just sorta happened...

I'm so unbelievable sugary right now, it's just not... well, it's little funny :P

On a lighter note, how cool is this spud trooper... goes with the spud vader I posted about yonks ago...

random thought of the day

if i drink a revitalising bottle of red bull, but then drink a cup of calming green tea, do the effects cancel out leaving me where I was originallY??? :S

h/core w/end :P

Migosh, the w/end was h/core... all the better to take my mind of things :D I think... Hmm.

In short:

Friday night, ate @ Crooners (something like 13 diff flavours of hot choc, as well as eggplant chips (YUMMM)) and saw Sin City with Ami - gratuitously extreme, but the artist in me takes my had off to the violently stylistic direction.

Saturday (!!) - This was all about Jo (my sis). Her 21st party (real bday was last month, 4/6) was simply awesome. Was ecstatic that it worked out so well for her - but will definitely post more thoughts on this when I have more time to expand in detail :D

Sunday, stuffed up by not making morning service in which I was supposed to be singing :( Apologised profusely to Victor... who ended up coming over between services anyways, and chatting with my mum and Mitch :P Sang @ Well+Being, awesome time of worship (I simply love Mei Fen's song!!), had a family dinner afterwards to celebrate my parents leaving this (mon) morning for HK :P And then the guys came over and we hung out... crawled into bed @ 4:30am :S Am thankful for an understanding workplace that allows me to come in @ 11am :D

So many of these thoughts I want to expand on, and will, when time permits :D

on a slightly lighter note... :P

Hmm... reading over that last post... I think I have a tendency to be a little overly dramatic. Oh, I really do feel that way sometimes, but I think the words I use could probably be a little less... extreme :P



Bleh, went to Glenny to get in a game of Initial D v.3 and some kids were on it the whole time :'( Granted, if I had gotten on it, I'd probably have stayed on it a bit too, but still :P



Walking out of Intencity I noticed an entry for Sin City on the screens... it's actually out!! Came out today!! I'd thought they pushed it until the end of the year!! Woohoo...

Alba is hot, hot, hot...

sometimes having a heart can just plain suck...

After one night of peace, my brain dutifully wakes up to the chaotic turmoil that it must just naturally seek :(

I mean, there is no other reason for it... it's almost like a tv that's stuck on one channel - whilst last night I was able to watch something else for a brief moment, I've turned it back on to find it stuck back on the same channel.

Is it the reception I'm getting? Do I have to physically relocate the tv in order to try and pick up a different signal?

There are times I wish I could rip out my heart and throw it as far as I can, just to get a moment of respite.

@ a loss for words

Yes, I know... it's not often it happens :P

But as I told Karen tonight, blank look on my face... for once, in the longest time, I'm all relationship-talked out :S

Korea, congratulations... you've done it... in short though, I loved tonight, I needed it.

For those who are just tuning in, tonight there was a relationships talk (tonight specifically for singles) at CityLife Church, by guest speakers John and Helen Burns, and Korea suggested I take a peek. So I did...

It really took a lot out of me @ the start, because there was so much that they talked about, and looking back, that I had done so wrong.

But the awesome bit is, I came out not dejected or depressed, but for the first time in a long while...


...@ peace.

the w/end in brief

saturday:

saw the initial d (live action) film on saturday night... migosh JChow is a terrible, terrible actor :S In short: Good movie for girls, bad movie for guys (at least for those who follow the anime).


Anne Suzuki, Jay Chow and [insert guys name]

Adjorned for peking duck, which was ok, but Victor wasn't terribly pleased :) I'm learning that M'sians are some of the most pickiest when it comes to food, and thus am going to respect their opinions about good restaurants :D

Then, to the kitten club for some jazz, which was actually pretty good - but it was loud-ish, didn't really allow for us to talk... and there's just something about jazz that makes you sleepy - then again, that might have been the southern comfort talking to me... after which was more drinking @ 3 degrees, and then arcade games @ russell st :D Mentioning Victor again, he is uncannily good for someone who's as old as he :P

sunday:

passed pretty event free, had a long, deep chat with birdie, and then had coffee with Aloysius - was good to catch up one-on-one with someone... all my usuals were away in Syd...

Touche :)

Blown away by Korea's posting (in response to my blogging about relationships) on her own blog, but I love it, and respect it heaps :)

I think there's a lot of insight there, and for someone to have written that much in response it either means they care that much... or I've managed to piss them off royally :D

I think though, because my blog is a reflection of my randomness, and because of the state of mind I'm going through, it might need to be named to 'nate's heart' and not my head, at least for the moment :S

So stupid... was @ star east last night by myself, mind wandering through relationship crap when I said, "that's it, I'm not going to think about that stuff anymore - going to eat happily, and think about something else!!". And lo and behold, right on cue, the people on the table next to me start talking about relationships, and not only that, but recent EX relationships... *sigh*...

God save the Queen :(

My heartfelt best wishes go to those who are in, or are affected by, the recent events in London - it's an awful, awful thing, and my prayers are truly with you.

Wishlist...

Warning: the following post may not be suitable for purer eyes (at least, you'll have to call me so I can explain the concept wholly)

Have just come from watching Mr & Mrs Smith, which I'd have to say, honestly, it wasn't a very good film - am even dubious as to whether it was worth the cheaper $6 ticket...

But I have (with both B. Pitt and A. Jolie in mind) come out of it with the thought that whenever I find myself in a relationship next, that I want my partner to be simmeringly hot, physically, and to have that explosive side in their personality.

Not to incite lust, but passion, and note, there is a difference!

I'm a fan of 'sweet' (heck, I watch far too many anime of that vein to deny it), and 'beautiful' is an attribute of which I am also deeply appreciative, but I simply want to be with someone that can melt me at call with her smouldering eyes.

Within the confines of a properly, bounded relationship, physicality is an aspect I would argue is long overlooked. I want a strong foundation, yes, I want a healthy, communicative relationship, yes, these things above all, but I also want a relationship that is simply hot.

That said, I'm also well aware that in order to find a girl like that, I would need to be a guy like that too. Am up to 40 pushups and 140 crunches a day... and I know there's still much more to it than just addressing physcial appearances, but nonetheless, fitter living here I come...

Note: I realise that there is so much more to a relationship, but yes - this is a blog of random thoughts! Not a complete, wholistic thesis :P

No pain... no gain? Hmm

Hehehe... I rant and rave about how lonely I am, and my fellow blogger friends sign on to show me otherwise :) In everything, in the little things, I am blessed :D

Had been debating about how much pain I needed to face to be able to deal with it all - as opposed to repressing it in my normal, past, natural response. Had been refusing to go out, in the fear that I might use it to take my mind off things, and not actually deal with them.

Yes, yes, I'm one of those people that is under the mindset that if it's hurting, it must be healing :P Or, rephrasing, if it's NOT hurting, then it ain't healing...

But I bit the bullet (I wonder where that phrase originated from... how bzar is it...), and went out with my friend Pat last night to Borders to read books - and it was such a mind freeing time :D

Just being able to sit there, sit in the kids section on the story-telling carpet, read comics, go through books like "Maybe he's just not into you" and laugh - it was just such a much needed, light, end to a night.

Oh, the new Harry Potter is out on 16th July @ 9:01am - it's a Sat (coincidentally the same day as Jo's 21st party). Anyone want to fight some kids with me...

state of affairs

I wonder if overstating what I've done or am doing is part of the single mindset... have been analysing the differences between outlooks, and attitudes :)

The great thing about a blog (esp one that no one reads) is that I can rant and rave about nothing in particular, be as selfish about talking about me as I want, and after having gotten it all out my system, appear relatively normal and functional in the real world :P

Am going through a pretty rough time @ the moment, having to deal with a lot of issues - I find myself, when in a group, talking about relationships and single-dom way too much... as much as I HATE to dwell on it, my mind just heads there automatically :(

Having been a leader for umpteen years, I've taught a few lessons on how God fills that loneliness, but am realising now that I haven't gone through it truely as many people have and still are.

I've always had a close bunch of friends and a gf, and only now am I beginning to realise what it is some people live with, have lived with for years. And can you even begin to imagine those without family...

Had begun to finally feel over the weekend, old :) Talking to Al, Victor... all of them saying, worrying about reaching 30... and me not knowing why, but now, beginning to see.

Just realising that in two years time... I'm going to be 27... an age by which I had thought/planned once upon a time to have been married by... and now not really close to at all.

And whilst I'm not terribly fussed about it, I can begin to see how it would feel for the guys.

Stumbled upon this singer @ a fundraising event (who's grace) on the w/end, and she has this song as a free d/load - and for this thought, it is awesomely suited :D

"You may feel you are aging

And you may think you're getting old

Don't you know this is just the beginning

This story's only starting to unfold"



Just Mine - Bianca Chen