I didn't quite know what to expect, only having gone to my grandfather's.
It broke me. Overwhelming grief at a little brother gone, guilt that I hadn't been a better friend after we had gone through so much together...
I cried when I saw him, but I sobbed when I talked to the family. When they started to speak fondly of the past, where I had taken Gene under my wing, for what I wonder was too short a time... wracked with guilt that I hadn't done enough for him... to reach him when I saw him drifting away.
Embarressed that they were now fine, and having to console me.
I have all these emotions that I'm still trying to keep in check, not sure, of what to make of them, not sure of what to do with them.
Gene, I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry. You were such a great guy, and such a great brother, and I'm sorry that I didn't make more time for you, that I didn't... *tearing*... I'm sorry...
jack, gene & nate
4 comments:
I'm here for you natey ...whether to be that crazy girl who'll run up to you with her arms waving crazily in the air and jump infront of you to get your attention... or to hear you out (i have 2 ears that are in 85% working order... remember the smoke alarm ... it damaged my ears!)
I still don't know what to say to you. I don't know what it's like. I can't help you. I don't have any answers. But I won't pretend to either. Anytime you need me, I'm there ok?
MATE gene death wasnt in vain .. DUDE dont be sad the game goes on!
and when it our time i know for fact that well see him once again! pain is short but love is endless!
yupz natey mate. cheer up! i kno how ya mean, only i wasnt nearly as close as u 2 were. ptboy [Gene] was probably the 1st dead person ive ever seen. in reality. but something that really stirred me was aunty jenny. wen i looked at her. man, like an child of God who had been hurt, but was being strong and facing up to the pain. She's got the giganticus heart, and the gentless spirit. i dunno the revelence. but yupz. oke oke. but cheerio!!
they say "what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger"
no need to feel guilty, thats not of God. but learn from it and i kno u have!!! awww mate. this is full on mush!! ehehe
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