I’m sitting in the evening service at the moment, listening to Corey Turner speak, and to be honest it’s hard to listen to him without a complete biasness; he’s a very overt charismatic, who chooses to use the normal methods of delivery in this context, which could be summed up as impassioned speech
My point of difference at this moment, is that Corey is purporting that the church needs to embrace the supernatural aspect more; and yes, the supernatural is in the bible, and were enacted through the disciples
I love though, the dialogue in Bruce Almighty, where they reduce the parting of soup to a parlour trick, and accord the status of a miracle to a single mother being able to work two jobs yet still find time to take her son to soccer practice
What’s harder; praying for someone as a once off, or visiting them every week, journeying through their struggles with them?
Yes, in the ideal, you would combine the both of those, you would pray AND journey with them, but if we are brutally honest with ourselves, how often do we just leave things at a prayer and the token follow up?
GOD is not a super side kick!! He’s NOT there for us to COMMAND him!! To have him conduct parlour tricks at our beck and call, or our behest!!
...
I sit here though, and wonder; what’s the point of being able to sit here and pick at things? Or that matter, is there really a point in us being able to get our doctrine super, squeakily correct?
So I have an issue with the church I go to choosing to make a “stand” on gay/same-sex registration, whilst advocating for parties that continue to make our upper-middle class lives more and more comfortable at the expense of the battlers; a church that is ok with making “proxy” judgments yeah, I have an issue with that
But at the end of the day, what does that matter? No, not a contentious question, but moreover a seeking one; seriously, what does it matter?
So what if I’m right doctrinally, or the church I go to is right??? At the end of the day will this have changed the world in any way???
Perhaps no, not really, and perhaps because the proportion of our lives that we truly devote to God is just that small
And before we start to argue about that, let’s differentiate between time we spend doing church things, and proportion of lives that is truly God’s. There’s a difference; time spent involved in church things could also be boiled down to what we choose to do with our left over parts of life
How much do we compartmentalise our lives; how much do we tell God that we’ve got the job thing worked out, the life plan worked out, the car plan worked out, the partner thing worked out (“I want that one!” What if God has a different person? Do we trust him, or do we just want?), and THEN we give Him the remainder of all that for Him to use???
So perhaps it’s not all that bad if we’re doctrinally incorrect, because the extent of the damage/good we can do out of the minute portion of our lives we truly give to God is probably, in the scheme of bettering the world, proportionally as small
Monday, April 30, 2007
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Ingredients...
It's funny the things I seem to need to be truly content...
A wet bike ride, quality comic book reading time, a packet of lollies and a sappy, American romantic comedy - these seem to be the bizar, key ingredients
A new bike is nice and all, and a job is good for putting bread on the table... but they don't make me (or at least, they're not meant to), and when those things aren't there for me anymore, will my foundation just disappear?
I'm beginning to think that those questions can never be answered by anyone properly, unless they regularly find themselves in those situations, where the carpet is regularly swept out from under their feet :P
I've attended and gone to many things in the last couple of weeks, some pretty exciting, some funny, some with people, and some even with a few interesting conversations, but tonight has been the first night in quite a while where I've gone to bed actually content
The joy and anticipation of the first lolly as I bust open the packet, settling onto the bench at Borders (Lygon Street) with a goodly collection of comic books, ready to be indulged with costumed crusaders... seems to be simply timeless and irreplaceable
In a society that subliminally indoctrinates us with the mindset that to have a life of any standing, one must be a social butterfly, that for a weekend to be considered a good one, one must be "out" having a big one on Fri/Sat nights; it seems quite contrary to like spending time with myself so much (or is it just narcissism on my part?)
Don't get me wrong, I'm more than happy for those who have big weekends, and enjoy them myself on occasion (prob too many), but at the end of a day, when it comes time to slink into bed, they still seem to fall short of a good packet of lollies (not too big, or I'll get sick :P), a place to sit and a stack of comic books
A wet bike ride, quality comic book reading time, a packet of lollies and a sappy, American romantic comedy - these seem to be the bizar, key ingredients
A new bike is nice and all, and a job is good for putting bread on the table... but they don't make me (or at least, they're not meant to), and when those things aren't there for me anymore, will my foundation just disappear?
I'm beginning to think that those questions can never be answered by anyone properly, unless they regularly find themselves in those situations, where the carpet is regularly swept out from under their feet :P
I've attended and gone to many things in the last couple of weeks, some pretty exciting, some funny, some with people, and some even with a few interesting conversations, but tonight has been the first night in quite a while where I've gone to bed actually content
The joy and anticipation of the first lolly as I bust open the packet, settling onto the bench at Borders (Lygon Street) with a goodly collection of comic books, ready to be indulged with costumed crusaders... seems to be simply timeless and irreplaceable
In a society that subliminally indoctrinates us with the mindset that to have a life of any standing, one must be a social butterfly, that for a weekend to be considered a good one, one must be "out" having a big one on Fri/Sat nights; it seems quite contrary to like spending time with myself so much (or is it just narcissism on my part?)
Don't get me wrong, I'm more than happy for those who have big weekends, and enjoy them myself on occasion (prob too many), but at the end of a day, when it comes time to slink into bed, they still seem to fall short of a good packet of lollies (not too big, or I'll get sick :P), a place to sit and a stack of comic books
Friday, April 27, 2007
Last days...
I want to blog today, but I load up the page somewhat sheepishly, knowing that I’ve rather neglected it!! I almost feel as someone asking someone out… sheepish… :P
Why today? Why blog today? Because it’s my last day! Well I’ll have to clarify seeing that in the last year or so I’ve had quite a few last days… last day at church (before moving into the city), last day at Urban Seed, last day at uni, last day with my bike, last day of a relationship, last day of bachelor-ness, and now, of the last days, I’ve come to my last day at World Vision
It seems a little clichéd to say this, but my time here really seems to have flown by. Incredibly lucky to even land the job in the first place, let alone the work I got to see and be involved in as well as the people I got to associate with, all has been amazing
Whilst it’s only been 4+ months I was here, and have been looking forward to the first whole week or so of rest I’ll have next week (something I’ve not had, continually running for the last year and a half!!), I still come to the end of it a little sad to leave
In hindsight, I’ve loved all the places I’ve been able to work at, and really hope that it’s been a little part of me bringing a part of that enjoyment to the places I go
Why today? Why blog today? Because it’s my last day! Well I’ll have to clarify seeing that in the last year or so I’ve had quite a few last days… last day at church (before moving into the city), last day at Urban Seed, last day at uni, last day with my bike, last day of a relationship, last day of bachelor-ness, and now, of the last days, I’ve come to my last day at World Vision
It seems a little clichéd to say this, but my time here really seems to have flown by. Incredibly lucky to even land the job in the first place, let alone the work I got to see and be involved in as well as the people I got to associate with, all has been amazing
Whilst it’s only been 4+ months I was here, and have been looking forward to the first whole week or so of rest I’ll have next week (something I’ve not had, continually running for the last year and a half!!), I still come to the end of it a little sad to leave
In hindsight, I’ve loved all the places I’ve been able to work at, and really hope that it’s been a little part of me bringing a part of that enjoyment to the places I go
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Guess I'll rest when I'm dead :)
I feel like laughing-crying-smiling-yelling all at the same time; it's been such a long sprint, it's been confusing, mostly because I haven't had the time to stop, reflect, and just spend that time with me and my God
Where to start? Wonder if it works if I just do it in straight chronological order...
Tues 3/4:
The day I pick up my new bike, after a few days of lots of communication back and forth, and a 3hr roundtrip to Maidstone, after waking up & getting to work @ 7:30am; later on that night, I get to unwind a little by seeing the new Audrey Tautou movie with viki, but by the end of it all it's late, and I'm exhausted
Wed 4/4:
The number plate I've been hankering for arrives in the mail, which after another long, tiring day @ work puts a small smile on my face, but then suddenly my day takes a sombre turn with news of Grandma's passing; I meet up with Mikey later that night, as the news of passing only slowly, slowly starts to register; again, I finish the night much later than I'd hoped, and again with no chance for personal and quiet respite
Thurs 5/4
Work is still a rush of activity as the project I'm on is reaching it's climax, with me at the core of it all; attempting to keep it going, deal with my Grandma's passing, and get as much as I can done before a long night in a farewell to Yen Pan & Dik Siew; again the night, whilst not a terrible one, ends much later than I wanted
Fri 6/4
Wedding @ midday, Easter play rehearsal in the afternoon and wedding reception in the evening; the day just seemed like an endless transition from one thing to another, all the more confusing with unresolved emotions still floating around as well as a physically exhausted state
Sat 7/4
A brief but significant break for me; I get to half-sleep in till 3:30 in the arvo, allowing me to catch up on some much needed sleep; help Jo a presentation for the funeral and then, it's off to the gentlemen's tournament, where in my half-aware & untrained state I manage to win one, lose one, then run off to practice for the Easter play, then go home to catch 3.5hrs of sleep...
Sun 8/4
...before having to wake up @ 5:30am to pick up Leanne from the airport; thank God for the 4pm sleep in on Sat :S Drive to the airport, come back, change, go to church, act, have lunch, go to viki's and then bum the day with her... all the way until 3-4am Monday morning :S Yikes... even just mentally recapping that spurt is scary...
Mon 8/4
TRIED to sleep-in, but calls & msgs kept waking me, so mission-not-really-accomplished; get up & dressed for the private viewing for my grandma, head back to my grandma's for dinner, then head all the way to Bundoora for Will's surprise, and then head all the way back, to try and get very little sleep for...
Tues 9/4
... the funeral, for which we all have to be up @ the crack of 7:30am; not only a day of incredible emotional stress, but physically exhausting as well, falling asleep in cars and at home for 15-20mins at a time to just keep up with it all
A beautiful day, and needless to say, an incredibly sad day; the day, that I've had not time to prepare mentally for, given lack of time, and just crashed into, and therefore found myself trying to deal with it all
Sad moreover, that even though I was farewelling my grandmother, my father was saying goodbye to his mum, that last of his parents, the devastatingly haunting image of an eldest son having to let go of his mum and dad for the last time; it is at last, my realisation of that significance, that gives me a deeper breadth of what it all means
Wed 10/4
And here I am, back at work, again at the end of a day too long, still running, still looking for a place to rest and be quiet, and yet to know when that time will come... crying softly, not over my exhausting run but for my father's loss, as I type
Where to start? Wonder if it works if I just do it in straight chronological order...
Tues 3/4:
The day I pick up my new bike, after a few days of lots of communication back and forth, and a 3hr roundtrip to Maidstone, after waking up & getting to work @ 7:30am; later on that night, I get to unwind a little by seeing the new Audrey Tautou movie with viki, but by the end of it all it's late, and I'm exhausted
Wed 4/4:
The number plate I've been hankering for arrives in the mail, which after another long, tiring day @ work puts a small smile on my face, but then suddenly my day takes a sombre turn with news of Grandma's passing; I meet up with Mikey later that night, as the news of passing only slowly, slowly starts to register; again, I finish the night much later than I'd hoped, and again with no chance for personal and quiet respite
Thurs 5/4
Work is still a rush of activity as the project I'm on is reaching it's climax, with me at the core of it all; attempting to keep it going, deal with my Grandma's passing, and get as much as I can done before a long night in a farewell to Yen Pan & Dik Siew; again the night, whilst not a terrible one, ends much later than I wanted
Fri 6/4
Wedding @ midday, Easter play rehearsal in the afternoon and wedding reception in the evening; the day just seemed like an endless transition from one thing to another, all the more confusing with unresolved emotions still floating around as well as a physically exhausted state
Sat 7/4
A brief but significant break for me; I get to half-sleep in till 3:30 in the arvo, allowing me to catch up on some much needed sleep; help Jo a presentation for the funeral and then, it's off to the gentlemen's tournament, where in my half-aware & untrained state I manage to win one, lose one, then run off to practice for the Easter play, then go home to catch 3.5hrs of sleep...
Sun 8/4
...before having to wake up @ 5:30am to pick up Leanne from the airport; thank God for the 4pm sleep in on Sat :S Drive to the airport, come back, change, go to church, act, have lunch, go to viki's and then bum the day with her... all the way until 3-4am Monday morning :S Yikes... even just mentally recapping that spurt is scary...
Mon 8/4
TRIED to sleep-in, but calls & msgs kept waking me, so mission-not-really-accomplished; get up & dressed for the private viewing for my grandma, head back to my grandma's for dinner, then head all the way to Bundoora for Will's surprise, and then head all the way back, to try and get very little sleep for...
Tues 9/4
... the funeral, for which we all have to be up @ the crack of 7:30am; not only a day of incredible emotional stress, but physically exhausting as well, falling asleep in cars and at home for 15-20mins at a time to just keep up with it all
A beautiful day, and needless to say, an incredibly sad day; the day, that I've had not time to prepare mentally for, given lack of time, and just crashed into, and therefore found myself trying to deal with it all
Sad moreover, that even though I was farewelling my grandmother, my father was saying goodbye to his mum, that last of his parents, the devastatingly haunting image of an eldest son having to let go of his mum and dad for the last time; it is at last, my realisation of that significance, that gives me a deeper breadth of what it all means
Wed 10/4
And here I am, back at work, again at the end of a day too long, still running, still looking for a place to rest and be quiet, and yet to know when that time will come... crying softly, not over my exhausting run but for my father's loss, as I type
Thursday, March 29, 2007
To my friends...
Gee, three posts for the entire month!! That’s dropping the blog-ball a fair bit :)
So why would this be… what’s happening to keep nate from venting virtually on a regular basis…
With so many good things happening, so many great times shared and experienced, it’s not for a lack of ‘stuff’…
Perhaps, it’s the excess of stuff that’s stopped me from taking this time out; an excess that I’ve only started to manage again, a recent spate of ‘nothing’ nights being the first in a while…
Not to mention quite a few things that I’ve been keeping quite close… as I’m perhaps too cowardly to commit them to writing for fear that they don’t eventuate…
Things are also starting to calm down (relatively; there’s still an insane amount to get done in the next week+) at work; I gave two training sessions (Mon & Tues just past), to interstate team leaders that were flown in from all around Aus to specifically be briefed on my project, which went off to spectacular success – upon review at the end of the day, all they seemed to remember were my anecdotes and my dry, dry humour :S Not to mention impressing quite a number of my colleagues, who had up to this point assumed I was just this quiet worker bee :P
But the nate snap-shot @ this moment? Things… are still somewhat confusing. Things are still so much in the air… for the longest time I’ve been living this life where everything has been influx… and still sorta is.
Jobs (and thus finances too), transportation, friends, churches, future dreams are all incredibly fluid right now… which is more than a little disconcerting for someone who loves to buy his movie tickets 12hrs in advance, and plan out as much as he can…
On that point, it’s stretching and growing to be with a girl that lives so naturally spontaneously, and to have a best bud that’s also going through a similarly impacting time of changes… the perfect companions for this ride I’m on…
So really… this post is about something… but nothing definite… which is… pretty much my life at this point :P I DO hope to catch up personally with all you, my close friends, soon and if I’m being reticent in doing so, and organizing things, please just drag me out!!
Have missed you all, and look forward to one-on-one coffees, adventures and carpark nights again…
Nathan
So why would this be… what’s happening to keep nate from venting virtually on a regular basis…
With so many good things happening, so many great times shared and experienced, it’s not for a lack of ‘stuff’…
Perhaps, it’s the excess of stuff that’s stopped me from taking this time out; an excess that I’ve only started to manage again, a recent spate of ‘nothing’ nights being the first in a while…
Not to mention quite a few things that I’ve been keeping quite close… as I’m perhaps too cowardly to commit them to writing for fear that they don’t eventuate…
Things are also starting to calm down (relatively; there’s still an insane amount to get done in the next week+) at work; I gave two training sessions (Mon & Tues just past), to interstate team leaders that were flown in from all around Aus to specifically be briefed on my project, which went off to spectacular success – upon review at the end of the day, all they seemed to remember were my anecdotes and my dry, dry humour :S Not to mention impressing quite a number of my colleagues, who had up to this point assumed I was just this quiet worker bee :P
But the nate snap-shot @ this moment? Things… are still somewhat confusing. Things are still so much in the air… for the longest time I’ve been living this life where everything has been influx… and still sorta is.
Jobs (and thus finances too), transportation, friends, churches, future dreams are all incredibly fluid right now… which is more than a little disconcerting for someone who loves to buy his movie tickets 12hrs in advance, and plan out as much as he can…
On that point, it’s stretching and growing to be with a girl that lives so naturally spontaneously, and to have a best bud that’s also going through a similarly impacting time of changes… the perfect companions for this ride I’m on…
So really… this post is about something… but nothing definite… which is… pretty much my life at this point :P I DO hope to catch up personally with all you, my close friends, soon and if I’m being reticent in doing so, and organizing things, please just drag me out!!
Have missed you all, and look forward to one-on-one coffees, adventures and carpark nights again…
Nathan
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
new song in nate’s head...
a magical night in a laneway from the past, with all of you in the city, my resie family...
in the memory of such loss, celebrating your beautiful wedding...
candle-lit dinners, and you my dear friends...
your smile, your voice, marking another day I find myself falling in love...
...and through it all, weaving it all together...
...is You
you and me
in the memory of such loss, celebrating your beautiful wedding...
candle-lit dinners, and you my dear friends...
your smile, your voice, marking another day I find myself falling in love...
...and through it all, weaving it all together...
...is You
you and me
Monday, March 05, 2007
To hot dates :)
Tonight, I had a hot date; an incredibly beautiful, witty and disarmingly charming one...
I chopped, assembled and candle-lit my way to a humble table spread (maybe I did pick up something last year, whilst setting lasagnes on fire with Christop...), put on a little mood music, and turned off the lights...
... and it was fun!! Even now, after I've just finished cleaning up (2hrs), it still seems like a very small price to pay for the specialness of the company
Maybe it was a combination of finally having had enough rest, and feeling for the first time in a long time, a stretch of days where I felt like me
Either way, it just felt right to show hospitality the way I used to in the city again, and incredibly fun to date five of my dear, dear friends tonight :D
I chopped, assembled and candle-lit my way to a humble table spread (maybe I did pick up something last year, whilst setting lasagnes on fire with Christop...), put on a little mood music, and turned off the lights...
... and it was fun!! Even now, after I've just finished cleaning up (2hrs), it still seems like a very small price to pay for the specialness of the company
Maybe it was a combination of finally having had enough rest, and feeling for the first time in a long time, a stretch of days where I felt like me
Either way, it just felt right to show hospitality the way I used to in the city again, and incredibly fun to date five of my dear, dear friends tonight :D
Thursday, March 01, 2007
ok it's official...
i have a bloody brilliant gf :o
There are many things that have happened recently (i.e. wedding & some torrid late, late nights), and will blog about them (later), but this one simply can't wait
About a month ago, viki asked me to keep tonight free; I checked my diary, saw it as free, and booked it in... she wouldn't tell me what, just told me to keep it free
I got to her place after a long, tiring day @ work, and almost near dead exhaustion (only marginally exaggerating), change clothes, and jump back into the car; she tells me where to go, and so we head there, me still not having the foggiest of the itenary of the night...
I find out just as we're entering the main auditorium that she's bought us tix to go see the LIVE production of...
I still can't believe it... and my face is still sore from all the laughing I did tonight... :D Just so blown away by the gesture... and feel, after what's seemed like an infinite period of weariness, undeservedly blessed :)
There are many things that have happened recently (i.e. wedding & some torrid late, late nights), and will blog about them (later), but this one simply can't wait
About a month ago, viki asked me to keep tonight free; I checked my diary, saw it as free, and booked it in... she wouldn't tell me what, just told me to keep it free
I got to her place after a long, tiring day @ work, and almost near dead exhaustion (only marginally exaggerating), change clothes, and jump back into the car; she tells me where to go, and so we head there, me still not having the foggiest of the itenary of the night...
I find out just as we're entering the main auditorium that she's bought us tix to go see the LIVE production of...
I still can't believe it... and my face is still sore from all the laughing I did tonight... :D Just so blown away by the gesture... and feel, after what's seemed like an infinite period of weariness, undeservedly blessed :)
Friday, February 23, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
nate's notes
“However, that personal God is never private. Restricting God to private space was the great heresy of the twentieth-century American evangelicalism. Denying the public God is a denial of biblical faith itself, a rejection of the prophets, the apostles, and Jesus himself. Exclusively private faith degenerates into a narrow religion, excessively preoccupied with individual and sexual morality whilst almost oblivious to the biblical demands for public justice. In the end, private faith becomes a merely cultural religion providing the assurance of righteousness for people just like us.”
nate's thoughts: whoa... is it wrong to immediately think that this scarily resembles the church I go to? Hehehehe... will I get expelled for daring to ask if that link exists? :P
But, more importantly than me pointing fingers, what are the implications of this passage for me?
One of the things I took away from last year is the active reconciling of faith and action; of action that goes beyond private institution and into the world, but hand in hand with a faith that compels and inspires it
This year was always going to be a stretching one for me; what does life look like after Urban Seed; how will I hang what the bible asks of us as socially responsible Christians, together with a life that naturally is me?
nate's thoughts: whoa... is it wrong to immediately think that this scarily resembles the church I go to? Hehehehe... will I get expelled for daring to ask if that link exists? :P
But, more importantly than me pointing fingers, what are the implications of this passage for me?
One of the things I took away from last year is the active reconciling of faith and action; of action that goes beyond private institution and into the world, but hand in hand with a faith that compels and inspires it
This year was always going to be a stretching one for me; what does life look like after Urban Seed; how will I hang what the bible asks of us as socially responsible Christians, together with a life that naturally is me?
nate's notes
p34
“The lesson is this: God is personal, but never private. If God is not personal, there is little meaning to faith. It merely becomes a philosophy or a set of teachings from religious figures who died long ago. Without a personal God, there is no personal dimension to belief. There is no relationship to transformation without a personal God, and no power that can really change our lives beyond mere self-improvement.”
nate’s thoughts: Passages like this show me that the author IS being relatively measured in his approach; neither taking a partisan side (i.e. left vs. right). It also challenges me; is the God I subscribe too, and choose to orientate my life to, is He my personal God also?
To find that balance where God is not simply a super-side kick that we can command around or ask to do things for us, but to also not live in the other extreme where it can be just acts, even if socially engaging and impacting, without a personal faith at the core of it all... I find this so hard to do... but the constant search for this balance keeps my faith alive, vibrant and real... it is painfully and annoyingly lifting :P
“The lesson is this: God is personal, but never private. If God is not personal, there is little meaning to faith. It merely becomes a philosophy or a set of teachings from religious figures who died long ago. Without a personal God, there is no personal dimension to belief. There is no relationship to transformation without a personal God, and no power that can really change our lives beyond mere self-improvement.”
nate’s thoughts: Passages like this show me that the author IS being relatively measured in his approach; neither taking a partisan side (i.e. left vs. right). It also challenges me; is the God I subscribe too, and choose to orientate my life to, is He my personal God also?
To find that balance where God is not simply a super-side kick that we can command around or ask to do things for us, but to also not live in the other extreme where it can be just acts, even if socially engaging and impacting, without a personal faith at the core of it all... I find this so hard to do... but the constant search for this balance keeps my faith alive, vibrant and real... it is painfully and annoyingly lifting :P
nate's notes
God’s Politics
- Jim Wallis, p33
“It was my mother’s admonitions that became the first building blocks for my emerging social conscience. Phyllis Wallis told her children to always do two things. First, if there is a child that nobody else will play with, you play with him or her, she ordered. It was like a rule of play for us – nobody gets left out. Second, if there is a bully who is picking on other people, you stand up for them, she courageously commanded. Virtually all my fights in school were with bullies.”
nate's thoughts: In the day and age of people raising their kids to be ahead of the curve, to be near or at the top of the class, to get ahead of life, there is an incredible homely resonance for me with this passage... the emphasis of others in an implicit acknowledgement of taking care of the wealth we have in the people we have around us, not in a charitable act of pity, but in a natural orientation of life... when I start to think along these lines, things make sense, life starts to make sense again for me, and becomes incredibly simple, significantly stress-less (I mean, what’s usually causing me stress? Usually material wants and needs!), and joyful, because I once again realise the riches I have are not what I own, but those around me
- Jim Wallis, p33
“It was my mother’s admonitions that became the first building blocks for my emerging social conscience. Phyllis Wallis told her children to always do two things. First, if there is a child that nobody else will play with, you play with him or her, she ordered. It was like a rule of play for us – nobody gets left out. Second, if there is a bully who is picking on other people, you stand up for them, she courageously commanded. Virtually all my fights in school were with bullies.”
nate's thoughts: In the day and age of people raising their kids to be ahead of the curve, to be near or at the top of the class, to get ahead of life, there is an incredible homely resonance for me with this passage... the emphasis of others in an implicit acknowledgement of taking care of the wealth we have in the people we have around us, not in a charitable act of pity, but in a natural orientation of life... when I start to think along these lines, things make sense, life starts to make sense again for me, and becomes incredibly simple, significantly stress-less (I mean, what’s usually causing me stress? Usually material wants and needs!), and joyful, because I once again realise the riches I have are not what I own, but those around me
nate's rants...
Have decided to start posting personal notes and reflections as I go through the book "God's Politics"; I realise it's probably not going to be as interesting to readers as BGR controversy, but like those thoughts, these are some that are close to my heart :)
nate does requests...?!
Nah, nah... as requested, here's a pic of me and viki... aren't I purdy... NOT... she's pretty hot though :D
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Ah, crap-on-a-stick...
... I got through to the 2nd round :( Good news you might think? No!! First of all, it means the not-getting-rejected uncertainty continues for at least another week, and secondly, the longer it goes for, the more I'll be disappointed by the eventual rejection... bleh :(
I don’t want to have to handle the possibility of earning more money that’ll be harder for me to give away/donate, I don’t want to have the temptation of “comfort” or start to value a person’s job and what they do (status and position), I want to stay happy with what I have, and a simple life… and in that Mikey, I’m the bigger coward
And please guys… don’t comment with things like “I’m sure you’ll be fine”, because I’m working really hard to keep life in this perspective!! I really don’t want to turn into a person that invests and hopes so much on a job that it starts to verge anywhere near my usual ecstasy over a solitary movie date, and a packet of lollies
I don’t want to have to handle the possibility of earning more money that’ll be harder for me to give away/donate, I don’t want to have the temptation of “comfort” or start to value a person’s job and what they do (status and position), I want to stay happy with what I have, and a simple life… and in that Mikey, I’m the bigger coward
And please guys… don’t comment with things like “I’m sure you’ll be fine”, because I’m working really hard to keep life in this perspective!! I really don’t want to turn into a person that invests and hopes so much on a job that it starts to verge anywhere near my usual ecstasy over a solitary movie date, and a packet of lollies
Waiting for rejection :)
Yesterday was killer, so much to do, so little sleep... and I think I really screwed up the interview too; not sure if it's because of how badly I did, and now I'm being a child about it, but I came out not feeling particularly great about the job, I came out with a pretty uncomfortable vibe; the cold metallic lift ride down, with a screen showing stock prices served to remind me of what such a job would entail, and the trappings of which I'd have to confine myself to if I was to embrace such a direction... yech...
So I'm kinda hoping that they'll give me a call this arvo to "thank me for coming in, but yeah, no thanks", so that I can just close that chapter, not have to pretend to be obsessed with corporate life and success, and after a good nights sleep tonight, enjoy the sunny, sunny weekend!! It'll be t-shirts and shorts riding weather for sure...
So I'm kinda hoping that they'll give me a call this arvo to "thank me for coming in, but yeah, no thanks", so that I can just close that chapter, not have to pretend to be obsessed with corporate life and success, and after a good nights sleep tonight, enjoy the sunny, sunny weekend!! It'll be t-shirts and shorts riding weather for sure...
Some words from Timbo Costa...
"Over this last weekend I preached four times in Adelaide churches. The largest gathering was at the Edge, a Pentecostal church with an estimated 5,000 members. It was held in a huge sports stadium. The church has taken the lead in renovating an entire wing of the Royal Women’s and Children’s Hospital in Adelaide. They have also done wonderful work at some dilapidated high schools close to their area. They are deeply involved in community transformation particularly on behalf of the poor. I was deeply impressed by their work and commitment. The test of the success of their ministry was not how many people were in the church but what impact they had on ensuring their community was healthy. A fine test to apply and to pass. As the pastor said to me his personal revelation was in reading the New Testament and finding that not one of Jesus’ miracles was performed within a church or sanctuary – all of them were out there in the wider community. That is where God is at work and where this church wants to act."
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
crush (krŭsh); v. crushed, crush·ing, crush·es
I seem to pick up a few things in my travels, and there are a few things that seem to be almost consistently common; i.e. people bemoaning a lack of romance in their lives (refer to below), as well as another weird phenomena, an incredible proportion of people maintaining or cultivating ‘crushes’
If I think back over the last couple of years, I can’t actually recall personally maintaining unresolved crushes for an extended period of time; the closest I could possibly relate to one over that period would be coming out of an encounter with someone, wondering why it was so, so fun, blog about it; as soon as I’d hit the “Publish” button, I’d then read over my literary piece, pat myself on the back, and then just get on with the rest of my life…
Maybe it was cuz I was blessed with incredibly close and intense friendship groups (blog squad, resies) that I never felt a dearth of relationship in the brief periods of singleness, I never really felt that I was missing anything in particular. You can read through my previous posts, I think I’m actually pretty consistent in that too, and not just spouting this off now…
Chasing God, and jumping into all the bizarre places He had for me was simply exhilarating; and together with Mikey, my family and misc friends, I really found myself lacking in nothing, life was amazingly rich
Which is why everytime I hear of unresolved (or unresolving) ‘crushes’, I have to admit, I’ve always failed to understand why they’re there…
Is it because people aren’t blessed with a similar caliber of friends? Is it because we’re subliminally indoctrinated that we need a partner to make us whole?
What confuses me even more is the sheer volume of those people with crushes that are waiting for that someone to come into their lives to share their love with, when there is an entire world going largely unloved by us; are we loving the poor, the neglected, those at the margins, wherever that may be in your context?
Loving people, is the most dangerous, most painful and the greatest thing we can ever do; and the very nature of love, is that it’s not what we can get, but what we give; exercise your heart, by making your life a natural orientation of love to the people around you in ALL contexts, now!!
Spiritual warfare isn't going to work as one prayer you say in six months that coincides with the exam you're sitting in five minutes, having an exquisite upper torso isn't something that just appears once it's summer and love isn't something you'll just be able to turn on; it'll come out, like the torso, weird, ineffective and... fat??? :P Rather than poignant, touching, meaningful and relevant.
Exercise your heart, so when that one person someday enters your world, and you wake up to find yourself in relationship, you can then love that person with a big, strong heart :)
If I think back over the last couple of years, I can’t actually recall personally maintaining unresolved crushes for an extended period of time; the closest I could possibly relate to one over that period would be coming out of an encounter with someone, wondering why it was so, so fun, blog about it; as soon as I’d hit the “Publish” button, I’d then read over my literary piece, pat myself on the back, and then just get on with the rest of my life…
Maybe it was cuz I was blessed with incredibly close and intense friendship groups (blog squad, resies) that I never felt a dearth of relationship in the brief periods of singleness, I never really felt that I was missing anything in particular. You can read through my previous posts, I think I’m actually pretty consistent in that too, and not just spouting this off now…
Chasing God, and jumping into all the bizarre places He had for me was simply exhilarating; and together with Mikey, my family and misc friends, I really found myself lacking in nothing, life was amazingly rich
Which is why everytime I hear of unresolved (or unresolving) ‘crushes’, I have to admit, I’ve always failed to understand why they’re there…
Is it because people aren’t blessed with a similar caliber of friends? Is it because we’re subliminally indoctrinated that we need a partner to make us whole?
What confuses me even more is the sheer volume of those people with crushes that are waiting for that someone to come into their lives to share their love with, when there is an entire world going largely unloved by us; are we loving the poor, the neglected, those at the margins, wherever that may be in your context?
- Do we walk by the beggars outside the Maccas, cnr of Swanston/Lonsdale?
- Do we only concern ourselves with the friends we “like”, or are like “us”?
- Do we really care about our friends, or are they just social circles for our own convenience?
- Do we say me first, and then wonder why someone isn’t saying you first?
- Are we still waiting for God to “gift” us with that one person, and only then we’ll take that risk to “love” someone?
Loving people, is the most dangerous, most painful and the greatest thing we can ever do; and the very nature of love, is that it’s not what we can get, but what we give; exercise your heart, by making your life a natural orientation of love to the people around you in ALL contexts, now!!
Spiritual warfare isn't going to work as one prayer you say in six months that coincides with the exam you're sitting in five minutes, having an exquisite upper torso isn't something that just appears once it's summer and love isn't something you'll just be able to turn on; it'll come out, like the torso, weird, ineffective and... fat??? :P Rather than poignant, touching, meaningful and relevant.
Exercise your heart, so when that one person someday enters your world, and you wake up to find yourself in relationship, you can then love that person with a big, strong heart :)
"sleep"? What's that?
Arggghhh… not only did I stay up till 4am working on a personal craft project, waking up @ 7:45am to still only get to work @ 9:10am, but I also have to ride into the city from work (with no break in between), somehow appear cognitive and awake for what will be a tough interview AND I’ve just checked the weather and it’s forecasting showers and possible THUNDERSTORMS for this afternoon
Great, just great… I finally catch up on all my sleep on Sunday, only to have a day like today (or the next few days for that matter)…
I’ll be fine… I just need to have this rant… *sigh*…
Great, just great… I finally catch up on all my sleep on Sunday, only to have a day like today (or the next few days for that matter)…
I’ll be fine… I just need to have this rant… *sigh*…
Thursday, February 01, 2007
ro·mance (rō-māns', rō'māns')
I come across a lot of people in my travels, of both single and attached varieties, complaining of a lack of romance in their lives; and no, I don't frequent singles bars, and as far as I can tell, the topic does not seem to be mutually exclusive to the social circles you might think I'm referring to (you know who you are!!)
Guys complaining about not knowing what to do, and how unfair that the onus is on them; girls complaining that guys just have no clue...
And whilst I find it fun sometimes to jump into light conversation on the idiosynchrosies that occur in the various realms of interactivity between genders (an intellectual way of saying "I'm from COC" or, "BGR"), it admittedly does frustrate me quite a bit
No, I'm not writing this with any ONE criminal in mind, I'm writing this with ALL of you in mind :P
Romance, like joy, is not a fleeting feeling, but a conscious state of mind, it's a life attitude; It is up to YOU to make a conscious decision to make your life romantic :)
Not that the Left are the best in everything, but charismatics have a tendency to just let life happen, perhaps to an extreme, and then just lament that it does; God is sovereign yes, and there ARE seasons of waiting, but there are also seasons to murder... whoops, I mean, do stuff :P God, an incredibly creative being, gave us all brains (then again, if you're reading this blog, you probably have a pretty small one :P) and surrounds us EVERY day with inspiration; how much of these talents, these gifts, of nature and our environments do we "bury"?
And don't try and counter with "but natey, it's easy for you because you already have someone"; ask anyone around me, even in the periods of singleness (yes yes ange / mikey, however brief they may be :P), I DO romantic things; it's who I am, it's who I enjoy being
I watch soppy movies (by myself), I skate along the beach, I go to dance classes... etc, etc...
I'm romantic to my close friends; a little extra thought can turn a present of coasters into the surprise of a thoughtful, relevant gift; a hug here, lotsa hugs there... well, ok, whilst I'm usually giving them, I'm having heaps of fun for me with them too :P
LOVE who you are, and in a world that teaches how to achieve your own goals, to look after your own self, be passionate about the people around you; it is who I am now, and the only way I want to live
Guys complaining about not knowing what to do, and how unfair that the onus is on them; girls complaining that guys just have no clue...
And whilst I find it fun sometimes to jump into light conversation on the idiosynchrosies that occur in the various realms of interactivity between genders (an intellectual way of saying "I'm from COC" or, "BGR"), it admittedly does frustrate me quite a bit
No, I'm not writing this with any ONE criminal in mind, I'm writing this with ALL of you in mind :P
Romance, like joy, is not a fleeting feeling, but a conscious state of mind, it's a life attitude; It is up to YOU to make a conscious decision to make your life romantic :)
Not that the Left are the best in everything, but charismatics have a tendency to just let life happen, perhaps to an extreme, and then just lament that it does; God is sovereign yes, and there ARE seasons of waiting, but there are also seasons to murder... whoops, I mean, do stuff :P God, an incredibly creative being, gave us all brains (then again, if you're reading this blog, you probably have a pretty small one :P) and surrounds us EVERY day with inspiration; how much of these talents, these gifts, of nature and our environments do we "bury"?
And don't try and counter with "but natey, it's easy for you because you already have someone"; ask anyone around me, even in the periods of singleness (yes yes ange / mikey, however brief they may be :P), I DO romantic things; it's who I am, it's who I enjoy being
I watch soppy movies (by myself), I skate along the beach, I go to dance classes... etc, etc...
I'm romantic to my close friends; a little extra thought can turn a present of coasters into the surprise of a thoughtful, relevant gift; a hug here, lotsa hugs there... well, ok, whilst I'm usually giving them, I'm having heaps of fun for me with them too :P
LOVE who you are, and in a world that teaches how to achieve your own goals, to look after your own self, be passionate about the people around you; it is who I am now, and the only way I want to live
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